Over the years, I’ve observed a continues trend regarding men’s mental health guidance, particularly on the Internet. Despite significant progress made over the last two decades, a terrible stigma still surrounds men’s participation in psychotherapy. Men are often reluctant to acknowledge their struggles, frequently masking the fact that they are in therapy, or even contemplating it.

It’s not uncommon for me to encounter men who reach out for help via phone or text, only for them to become embarrassed upon realizing they’re engaging in a conversation about their mental health. In some cases, they even deny that they sought assistance in the first place.

This stigma has worsened with the rise of influencers on social media who spread the idea that seeking mental health support is not only unnecessary but outright damaging. They preach that men should rely on physical activities such as hitting the gym or practicing martial arts instead of talking to a “shrink.” These assertions falsely push the absurd notion that one can simply toughen up and push through feelings of depression or anxiety. The implication is that physical workouts can somehow erase deep-seated emotional pains, be it relational loneliness or the psychological aftermath of a toxic relationship, by merely increasing the weight on the bench press.

Adding to this problem, some self-proclaimed therapy experts argue that men experience mental health issues differently and may not benefit from traditional psychotherapy. Unfortunately, these voices often prioritize gathering YouTube followers over engaging in meaningful discussions about the complexities of mental health. To claim that men do not benefit from psychotherapy is not only misguided but arguably harmful. Men in fact do benefit from therapy and have for many years.

I am by no means undermining the significance of physical fitness or discipline. In fact, I wholeheartedly believe that these elements can work in tandem with effective mental health strategies. Nevertheless, many men attempt to evade their issues, frequently seeking distractions only to discover that suppressing their problems manifests in unhealthy ways which can often affect their work, friendships, relationships and possible new relationships. This sublimation (channeling anxiety, depression, and mental health challenges into hobbies or physical activities) ultimately diverts focus from confronting and resolving these issues head-on.

Despite the echoes of unhelpful narratives, it is crucial to remember that men can indeed thrive through psychotherapy. Whether the challenges lie in dating, personal relationships, or understanding behavioral patterns, men have the potential to overcome significant obstacles by simply showing up for themselves.

I’ll leave it at this, challenging the stigma around seeking mental health care is vital for men everywhere. By choosing to engage in therapy, men can not only confront and conquer their personal struggles but can also foster healthier, more fulfilling relationships.